Grumpy mood these days

I don't know why but I can't seem to not raise my voice

I feel so tired like my energy is being sucked away by some invisible force. This morning was one of my worst moments. Everything that I've bottled up inside was boom! unleashed today! I hate listening to all the angry voices in the morning ):

I just need more sleep zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


Nvm, teriyaki chicken tmr! :D Can't wait yay!


Anyway 2.4 yesterday was horrible and I stopped again, AGAIN ): I have lousy yi zhi li ): ): I MUST HAVE GOOD DETERMINATION YES I SHALL RUN THREE TIMES A WEEK AND SWIM ONCE A MONTH. It seems very little but at least it's a start? :D MUST MOTIVATE ME TO EXERCISE OKAY AND NOT TO OVEREAT! I've decided to get rid of all my stupid silly never seem to work diets cause I end up eating more and gaining weight instead!!!! I MUST BE HEALTHY AND HAVE A BALANCED DIET AND REGULAR EXERCISE YES I FEEL SO EXCITED JUST THINKING ABOUT IT AND I MUST START SAVING MONEY! Sounds kind of pathetic I'm sixteen yet I have yet to save any form of money hahahaha. I don't know where all my money goes to!

Hmm prelims is in 20+ days but I still don't feel the adrenaline rush like I should ): Is that good or bad? I think I'm doomed I'm getting so lazy! Must stop getting distracted!! BUT I JUST BOUGHT TWILIGHT! I'm very lag I know hahaha it's the peer pressure book ah! -INSIDE JOKE :D- I shall not talk on the phone so often! I shall stop watching tv! I shall stop sleeping after I watch tv! i shall stop going out so often! Yay to my "new" life! :D

Anyway, I know some people don't feel the same way I do. But I'm starting to like the class more and more. We have more gatherings now!! Even if it is with like a bunch of random people and gets really awkward sometimes but it is still nice! (: At least we are starting to "break out of our own comfort zone" and like stop residing in our own shells hahaha doesn't sound correct but nevermind, have the meaning there can already.

Okay since the stupid pig is sleeping I shall do MATH MATH MATH MATH! it's funny how math used to be one of my strongest subject but it's my weakest now!

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY
MY _____ IS FEELING CONFUSED YET WEIRDLY WARM AND FUZZY AT TIMES

More happy stuff!
Debra's birthday celebration today! :D
&
I won free goodies!
&
I ate chewy junior!
&
&
&





I saw someone on the mrt! ;)

I DONT KNOW

Back to blogger.

I'll prolly go back to lj or xanga soon.


Life has been hectic. I HATE EXAMS AND MY LOUSY RESULTS .I've been neglecting my studies so much yet I still don't feel the need to study! Not planning to study for next week tests. I'm so sick of facing the books everyday and all the constant nagging la de da ladeda. Sometimes I really wish I could just shut people up ):

haihhhhhhhhzxzxzxzxzxzx


It's so sad when you see people wheeze by and go. Thinking about my life is depressing like really depressing. Makes me feel like a failure at times.
I'm sorry that you girls had to feel like a sidekick and I was really affected when I heard that. I don't know what is it that made you think that way but I've never regarded you as one. Maybe it's my actions or words I really don't know. It's so hard to talk to people at times i rather not talk at all and just listen , so much easier ain't it?

I see us drifting apart. Maybe it's my fault la for saying those words resulting in stupid tension between us to the extent that seeing you makes me rigid talking to you feels awkward like I have to be super duper conscious about every single thing I do. I don't even talk to the people I used to talk to anymore.

I feel so mean to you and you and you ); I don't want to but . . . . no excuses I guess



MY LIFE IS TAKING A TURN for the worst or better? I DONT KNOW! D:






I MUST BE OPTIMISTIC!
I like talking to my bestfriend more these days! (: He makes me happy! At least there is the one happy thing in my life!

Okay, more happy stuff!

JANE'S BIRTHDAY!
Decided to go in the end like finally after thinking for so long!( IM SUPER INDECISIVE JUST ASK REUBEN OR FANGYING HAHA ) Bought this damm cute watermelon cake! SO CUTE LA THE BURGER ONE RESERVED FOR SOMEONE ELSE ALR AH! Then went to eighteen chefs and then Jane came and we snag happy birthday and eat and talk! (: Then went over to the playground to . . . . . talk? hahaha just sat around in a circle and play games and take pictures and busy taking care of babies too!

omg guess what I kind of forget what I've been up to for the past few days! Hahahah that's all I can remember actually ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I'm such a loser ahhhh

oh wait!

there was MAGICBOX! It was very very nice actually! But I was so tired that I fell asleep at the climax!!!!! and my contacts were so irritating I just removed them during the show. So I was like this girl squinting her eyes desperately trying to figure out what's happening! & MAVIS IS JEALOUS OF ME HEH HEH CAUSE SOMEONE REMEMBERS ME HEH HEH EVEN MORE! :D Cabbed down to whitesands with mavis and met with BF( I MUST BE INSANE ) and went home.

NCOMP too! It was weird going in sjtee and shorts and slippers and making noise like nobody business. Must get use to becoming a senior! it's quite fun actually :D
Hmm so results were okay actually.
Dinner was as usual just that this year i got FRIED RICE! >:( I remember for the past three years when I would chiong for the horfun! Played Captain Toilet Roll when I really embarrassed myself but nevermind it's all in the past put it behind me man! At the end of the day I was so itchy ah I nearly died from all the itchiness! AHH AND I WAS TOUCHED THAT BF CAME DOWN TO WALK ME HOME :D EVEN THOU I SUSPECTED YOU WERE ON THE WAY I WAS STILL SURPRISED AND TOUCHED LA HOR :D

Okay I can't really remember anything else alr!
BYEBYE TIL THEN ;D

its amazing how you can actually convince yourself to be happy merely by talking happily moving happily behaving happily sleeping happily eating happily smiling happily but...... never feeling happy

I've keep it up for two months! Go go go! (:

Happy happy happy happy be happy that's what I tell myself everyday and it keeps me going!(:

It's just five more days come one man wake up wake up wake up!

cry for me Argentina

how much do you know?or care

The best vday present this year <3

It's February alr!
6 more days to the imaginary two years, hahaha!

The only reason I'm actually typing this is cause no one and i repeat NO ONE is supposed to be reading this right now! In fact everyone ought to be at rrollingstones and not here not here! So if you happen to be the stupid one whom clumsily found your way here be a nice person and keep this to yourself okay! (:

Okay, Hi I miss you idiot and I'm an idiot for missing you!):
Pui pui, Chinese new year cannot say inauspicious words ah.

I miss you, end of story.

Ah, what a relieve to be able to type that out! Even if it makes no difference, hahah!

Start as friends? Nah, not possible. You said so. (:

Somehow I don't know what to say again. again
It felt so weird ,
here
there
him
her
you
they

bet you didn't know
& still won't know

Merry christmas!

Time out ,
I need some alone time

C a n t w a i t f o r k o r e a !

Listen to me this once,

Hello so now I'm back to blogger? I don't really know actually it all depends on my mood I guess, sometimes I feel like going to lj and sometimes back to blogger. And to J I know you're reading this! So stop it!!!!!!! & johanna too! I don't know why I'm typing this down cause I know you guys probably won't care and continue reading. Lol.
I don't know what I'm feeling these days. it's driving me crazy and making me confuse ): Just a sudden bolt of sadness I suppose? I just really miss the old times I guess, I'm forever thinking about the past about my hibye friends. When those hibye friends really mean the world to me and now they seem so distant. It has even come to such an extant whereby I actually hate them for who they have become and for leaving me just like that. Aiya, why am I always rambling on about such stuff. I'm sure it irritates you, trust me I'm not only talking about weihua. Oh oh! The courage to finally type out his name! Hahaha. It has been what, N I N E months! Wow, that's damm fast isnt it? To you maybe but nevertheless, it's going to be a full 365 days soon! I mean I don't care about what you think now after what you've said. You really ought to look at yourself, and yeah word of advise? Don't make a promise you know you can never fufill. Yet, I ought to thank you for those short lived but nevertheless happy memories haha. I don't really care if she sees this or any of hercummy friends or even you or even those mindless gossips out there I mean it's my blog if you're so unhappy with what I'm writing, hey you have two choice, one you can go on straight to my face and tell me about it or two you can just never come my blog again.
Ahhhh, it feels great to rant everything I've been bottling up inside for so long even though I know I'll probably regret every single word that I've typed and just type out another sobsorry post again. It's a never ending cycle you see? Haha, but for now, that's it.

Byebye and goodnight! (:

I feel like a total loser

I feel like I don't have any friends, as untrue as it seems. I can't find someone I can really click with , someone I don't mind telling everything to, someone I can relate too.

I don't know it's like I always end up as the extra one somehow, be it in class or in stjohns.

Sometimes, it's like I'm always taken for granted. But whatever.

It's just a year more and I'm gone.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME {:

Whooooo, long time no seeeee!

Sometimes I wonder what are friends for& why is it my close friends always end up as strangers to me.

You know how much I love talking and whinning and complaining and how much I can't keep all my troubles within myself. I love being able to express myself openly with no constrictions or what so ever. But lately I find myself controlling every single thing I do. It's like I can't express my true self openly anymore? I don't know. I have to choose certain things to tell certain people and THAT SUCKS LIKE HELLLLL. I hate it but yet I have to do it to prevent ladeeda cause it concerns your friends ya ya ya & how I have to spare a thought for you bblahblah. & because of that, including the fact I hardly tell you anything anymore or rather even talk to you, we drift apart. SO MUCH! I miss you like hell but you don't. That hurts like shit. Oh man, shitty english, hahahaha. But still, I can't believe we've drift apart so much you know. You were really my gooooodest friend back then ): Oh well, at least it's better than being strangers. But I still miss you and I want the old you back even if they don't.


Okay enough ranting, I'm suppose to be happpppy! Happy happy happy me!

I feel happy ,
what about you?

{:

L Yes, FINALLY!
Audrey OMG AUDREY's CUTE FACE! can't get over it , hahahahahahaha
Zw hello hello hello hello hello again ^^
Gina You're welcome ^^ hahaha & THANKS MAN! YOU GO OUT WITH SOMEONE TODAY AR! AND IM STUCK AT HOME WITH NOTHING TO DO.
Debra AHHHHHHHH NOOOO<>
K Walau go away, dumb ass
Gina Hahahahaha, the ElMO clan!
Wanling EMOPIG GO DIEEEEE
Megan EMOPRINCESS GO DIEEEEE TOOOOO
Seemui Hahaha toilet partner! Let's go to the toilet and then to the arcade and let everything offff!
Sieg YALORXZ, you are so chio worx
Joey hahahhaha elmo is the best emo best friend you can have!
Debra 'Cause i roll roll roll untill rollingstones. hahahahahaha
Zw Helllllo again! ( nearing the tenth time! )
Eunice HELLO! (:
K Updated dumb

Okay, I'm in a super pissed off mood and I don't know prolly because I'm stuck at home with nothing to do and I hate that bye bye

RROLLINGSTONES FOR NOW

GINA AND I HAVE THE SAME SKIN (:
LURBEXXX WORSSS :)
XOXOXOXOXO!

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY GUAN XIQUAN!
You're 18 & that's old. Haha



But you're still so cute worx!


Here's a brief post on the past few days

Friday
Combined games with GB



Watermelon fiesta!





& it was nice(:

Then it was graduation ceremony which wasn't very interesting, ended up nodding off to sleep.

Met SJ people and we went off to marina square to celebrate DOGGIE's birthday! :D Ate at Carl's JR with their unbelievably huge burgers then hopped on to Changing Appetite for their mudpies which was !

Saturday
Caught Mr Woodcock which was okay, wasn't very nice actually, furthermore the %$#^!(! at the back were so irritating I swear I felt like dumping my nachos over them! On the other hand, I absolutely loveeeeeeeeeee nachoooooooos! With ADDED CHEESE! :D Haha, thanks for accompanying me anyway, Gina's 5 minute best friend.

Sunday
was spent raising funds for May who is going to Nepal for volunter work. Sang with the parents and headed over to the bowling alley and ARCADEEE! I seemt to be visiting the arcade more now ^^ It really relieves stress man, hahaha. Singing with parents was entertaining. Well, entertaining is an understatement la. Couldn't stop laughing, now I know where I got my FANTASTIC singing genes from! Haha!


& It's confirmed, NO CHIANG RAI! Oh well, I'm starting to regret (AGAIN) but at least my mum says she is considering going to BANGKOK instead! :D YAY YAY YAY! Hahah, besides I can always go to NEPAL or AFRICA for such stuff if I want to in ten years to come! ^^

Not forgetting, SPEACIAL THANKS TO L (WHO REQUESTED FOR THIS) FOR RECOMMENDING ME A WALK TO REMEMBER CAUSING ME TO USE UP HALF A BOX OF TISSUE. THANK YOU SO MUCH AR FOR MAKING ME CRY. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :E

Gina Mwahahahahahha, laughs back! EMOBLACK!
ZW Hello emoboy!(: Haha
L Wah, I feel like killing you already la. There's your post! Happy anot! :E
Wanling Welcome, anytime man ^^ DO YOU KNOW WHAT SONGS I LIKE!
Debra Haha, use it then! Eh you missed out something! PRETTY Nancy Drew(:
Megan Yupyup! THE NOTEBOOK is even better!
Johanna Hahah, soooooon!
L Wahhhhh, you damm naggy la!
Kw boo you! :D

For wanling



There's a song that's inside of my soul.
It's the one that I've tried to write over and over again
I'm awake in the infinite cold.
But you sing to me over and over and over again.

So, I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours, I pray, to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope.

Sing to me the song of the stars.
Of your galaxy dancing and laughing and laughing again.
When it feels like my dreams are so far
Sing to me of the plans that you have for me over again.

So I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours, I pray, to be only yours
I know now, you're my only hope.

I give you my destiny.
I'm giving you all of me.
I want your symphony, singing in all that I am
At the top of my lungs, I'm giving it back.

So I lay my head back down.
And I lift my hands and pray
To be only yours, I pray, to be only yours
I pray, to be only yours
I know now you're my only hope.

hmmmmm, hmmmmm, oooooh.



Love you darling ♥

Hey, there's always more to life then you know.
I'm sure that your pleasant surprise is somewhere 'round the corner waiting for you, so don't be sad anymore okay! Smile more FATPIG^^

I ran out of eggs):
Screw you eggs!